Thank you for this, Joe. I've always found myself trying to answer the questions that no-ones asked, so desperate to find someone who actually wants to hear the truth. Honestly, I don't think there are many of us who do, which is why I'm really grateful for this writing spiral, and really interested to see what question I get asked. I hope it helps me to dig deep, and set free some monsters.
This hit like a psalm written by a feral poet with dirt under their fingernails and too many truths to stay polite.
"Who would you be if no one had ever rewarded your restraint?" That question didn’t echo—it detonated. Somewhere between the courtroom of selves and the bonfire of blueprints, I saw my old spiritual life pass by in a flaming chariot made of unasked questions.
This whole piece feels like a gentle heresy. Like a sacred refusal. Like someone finally admitting that the search for “clarity” was just another way to stay safe and small. I don’t want safety anymore. I want the monster's breath on my neck. I want the question that refuses to be solved.
Thank you for inviting us into this spiral—not a path up or down, but inward. Like peeling back layers of a self that was never supposed to be coherent.
I’ll be sitting with this one. Or maybe I’ll stop sitting and start unraveling.
I love the idea of learning to live with the questions. I am sad to say that my own Christian faith tradition has gotten a bad rap (and rightfully so) for trying to force answers and certainty into spaces only suitable for mystery, wonder and curiosity.
Yet the best parts of our tradition are filled with unanswered questions in the pursuit of wisdom.
Holy scriptures don't even agree in themselves on every issue and we literally cannonized the beautiful and ongoing theological debates passed on from our Jewish ancestors. Now that's a tradition that is generally much better at living with questions.
This writing spiral is a great way to truly listen to others and learn to sit with the questions we never even thought to ask.
“Who would you be if no one had ever rewarded your restraint?”-
When I realized that I was at peace, with speculative surety, the answers to that question;
I began to think I had been allowed for a just a moment… to take in the aroma of one dish, of the never ending feast, that humanity can perceive as wisdom…
Doesn’t restraint precede forgiveness?
Then…
Who would I be, if I had never been forgiven?
And… if I hadn’t been taught through example… firsthand.
Who would I be if I didn’t forgive?
Forgiveness ~
Forgiveness does NOT relieve the burden of guilt.
To forgive is to agree to NO RETRIBUTION. Choose.
Forgiving frees you!
Forgiving frees you from the Weight of anger, and resentment, the fuel of vengeful thoughts, the dread of future encounters! Forgiveness Frees you from ALL the things that are Crushing your ability to love others, And yourself…
It still hurts… Choose.
It can take time… Choose.
AAAAAARGH! Shitfuckdammit!!!!!
Sigh… breathe… breathe… choose.
Feel the weight leaving your spirit, your heart, your mind, and your body…
Breathe… grieve a little and think of something or someone Peaceful and Loving… breathe…
Go and do something peaceful. Then go and do something Loving and completely unselfish.
Although this text is beautifully written, I cannot really relate to it, because personally I don't share these experiences. I am a happy person by nature - probably a lot of dopamine in my brain, just like my mother and grandmother, so that's genetic - and I always see things in a positive light. No demons. You would probably argue that I buried them too deep. Maybe. But I'm looking forward to what that spiral will bring. Thank you for starting it!
I may well be out of my depth here. My self awareness has been so clothed in industrial strength theatre canvas that even I cannot really penetrate it and, to be honest, I'm not sure I want to. So I try to approach life with few questions, my answers to past questions have been framed, gilded and hung on the wall, I am secure even if that means despair. Thanks for the post, it provokes thought even if it doesn't, for me, provoke questions.
Release the cuffs of restraint and start living. ✌️❤️⛓️💥
Thank you for this, Joe. I've always found myself trying to answer the questions that no-ones asked, so desperate to find someone who actually wants to hear the truth. Honestly, I don't think there are many of us who do, which is why I'm really grateful for this writing spiral, and really interested to see what question I get asked. I hope it helps me to dig deep, and set free some monsters.
Hmmm🤔
This hit like a psalm written by a feral poet with dirt under their fingernails and too many truths to stay polite.
"Who would you be if no one had ever rewarded your restraint?" That question didn’t echo—it detonated. Somewhere between the courtroom of selves and the bonfire of blueprints, I saw my old spiritual life pass by in a flaming chariot made of unasked questions.
This whole piece feels like a gentle heresy. Like a sacred refusal. Like someone finally admitting that the search for “clarity” was just another way to stay safe and small. I don’t want safety anymore. I want the monster's breath on my neck. I want the question that refuses to be solved.
Thank you for inviting us into this spiral—not a path up or down, but inward. Like peeling back layers of a self that was never supposed to be coherent.
I’ll be sitting with this one. Or maybe I’ll stop sitting and start unraveling.
I love the idea of learning to live with the questions. I am sad to say that my own Christian faith tradition has gotten a bad rap (and rightfully so) for trying to force answers and certainty into spaces only suitable for mystery, wonder and curiosity.
Yet the best parts of our tradition are filled with unanswered questions in the pursuit of wisdom.
Holy scriptures don't even agree in themselves on every issue and we literally cannonized the beautiful and ongoing theological debates passed on from our Jewish ancestors. Now that's a tradition that is generally much better at living with questions.
This writing spiral is a great way to truly listen to others and learn to sit with the questions we never even thought to ask.
What if the answers dont matter... and it is only your own answers that lead to a life well lived! Ohhh the spiral.... what shall be the focus today!?
“Who would you be if no one had ever rewarded your restraint?”-
When I realized that I was at peace, with speculative surety, the answers to that question;
I began to think I had been allowed for a just a moment… to take in the aroma of one dish, of the never ending feast, that humanity can perceive as wisdom…
Doesn’t restraint precede forgiveness?
Then…
Who would I be, if I had never been forgiven?
And… if I hadn’t been taught through example… firsthand.
Who would I be if I didn’t forgive?
Forgiveness ~
Forgiveness does NOT relieve the burden of guilt.
To forgive is to agree to NO RETRIBUTION. Choose.
Forgiving frees you!
Forgiving frees you from the Weight of anger, and resentment, the fuel of vengeful thoughts, the dread of future encounters! Forgiveness Frees you from ALL the things that are Crushing your ability to love others, And yourself…
It still hurts… Choose.
It can take time… Choose.
AAAAAARGH! Shitfuckdammit!!!!!
Sigh… breathe… breathe… choose.
Feel the weight leaving your spirit, your heart, your mind, and your body…
Breathe… grieve a little and think of something or someone Peaceful and Loving… breathe…
Go and do something peaceful. Then go and do something Loving and completely unselfish.
Be Free!
Full disclosure- Jesus helped me.
DRD 6/24/25
Although this text is beautifully written, I cannot really relate to it, because personally I don't share these experiences. I am a happy person by nature - probably a lot of dopamine in my brain, just like my mother and grandmother, so that's genetic - and I always see things in a positive light. No demons. You would probably argue that I buried them too deep. Maybe. But I'm looking forward to what that spiral will bring. Thank you for starting it!
I may well be out of my depth here. My self awareness has been so clothed in industrial strength theatre canvas that even I cannot really penetrate it and, to be honest, I'm not sure I want to. So I try to approach life with few questions, my answers to past questions have been framed, gilded and hung on the wall, I am secure even if that means despair. Thanks for the post, it provokes thought even if it doesn't, for me, provoke questions.